It’s a startling and unsettling realization I’ve had lately:
I’m going to be working on myself for a long time to come.
You’ve probably arrived at the same conclusion. That annoying habit you thought you overcame? It’s resurfaced lately. That nagging insecurity you sometimes feel? It hasn’t entirely faded. That sinful tendency you determined to leave behind? It’s ba-ack.
Chances are good there are many things that have changed about you. A long list of shifts in your character, attitude, and actions. Milestones in your quest to be a better you.
But the fact remains there are still dysfunctional parts of you, right? Frustratingly incomplete aspects of your personality… and of your faith. You’re going to be working on yourself for a long time to come.
Which is exasperating. It would be much easier if there was a spiritual microwave we could pop our souls into, press just the right combination of buttons, and two minutes later be fully developed. Emerge bursting with confidence in Christ. Triumphant over every single sin. Never in danger of losing our perspective or our temper again.
But there’s no microwave. No shortcut.
It’s a lifetime project.
Someone said something recently that stuck with me. They mentioned a person newer to their faith we both knew was struggling and said: “they just need more of Jesus.” They didn’t say it condescendingly (as if the person wasn’t spiritual enough already), or regretfully (as if finding more of Jesus had little chance of happening), but humbly and hopefully (with a confidence that, given a little more time headed in his direction, things would change.) They said it understanding that it’s a lifetime project.
You know what? I just need more of Jesus too – and so do you. And I’m not going to find that in some spiritual microwave, trying to zap myself into spiritual maturity. I’m going to find it working side by side with him, sleeves rolled up to our elbows, engaged in this lifetime project. I’m going to find it making mistake after mistake and achieving success after success, day after day.
So whatever is irritatingly incomplete about you – whatever you’ve been fighting with, fearing most, or failing at – what if you stopped longing for an instantaneous resolution and embraced instead a slower, ultimately more satisfying relationship with God?
What if your primary goal wasn’t to decrease your imperfections but to increase Jesus?
In “The Pursuit of God,” A.W. Tozer wrote: The man who has struggled to purify himself and has had nothing but repeated failures will experience real relief when he stops tinkering with his soul and looks away to the perfect One. While he looks at Christ the very things he has so long been trying to do will be getting done within him.
You just need more of Jesus. And you can’t find that in a spiritual microwave. It’s a lifetime project. Keep going.
Comments